“There’s a longing in our hearts…..” So goes the song. A longing to connect with the divine.
On the matter of how we develop a relationship with the divine… In recent decades, there has been a growing number of people who identify as “spiritual but not religious.” The Barna Group, in their studies on “spiritual but not religious (SBNR)” individuals, describe this SBNR demographic as having a “spirituality that looks within;” that “to be religious is to be institutional—it is to practice one’s spirituality in accordance with an external authority. But to be spiritual but not religious is to possess a deeply personal and private spirituality. Religions point outside oneself to a higher power for wisdom and guidance, while a spirituality divorced from religion looks within. Only a fraction of the two spiritual but not religious groups (9% and 7%) talk often with their friends about spiritual matters. Almost half (48% each) say they rarely do it, and they are 12 (24%) to eight (17%) times more likely to never talk with their friends about spiritual matters than both practicing Christians and evangelicals (2% each).”
In western society, we also have an “epidemic of loneliness” in which too many lonely individuals are longing for community. The U.S. Surgeon General, in his 2023 report on the “Epidemic of Loneliness,” speaks – on page 23 – about a return to more involvement in faith-based communities as part of the solution to this epidemic.
A “spirituality that looks within” and is divorced from formal religion can certainly be tempting (I’ve “been there, done that.” I am actively learning to grow out of that perspective! Even many mystics and hermits live in some degree of community.). While we absolutely and essentially need time for personal reflection and quiet prayer (daily, for me), to look within can too easily become a lonely, isolated endeavor – rather than a community-centered faith in which a significant aspect of our faith is an outward-driven focus on being of service to other people.
The two greatest commandments are “Love God and love your neighbor” (Matthew 22:36-40). Love – like faith – is a verb! As a verb, love is more than having positive feelings about or toward someone; it’s about an outwardly-focus doing of loving actions. Love your neighbor requires faith-driven community (rather than loneliness!), despite any protestations to the contrary. …..”Yes,” some will say, “But I can be good to people as a result of my inward spiritual-but-not-religious faith pursuit.” To some degree, perhaps. A faith community, however, pulls us actively out of ourselves more than we typically achieve solo. In a faith community, a group’s social dynamics pull us out if ourselves (serve the good of the group and individuals within the group). Further, there are group “love your neighbor” volunteer activities (soup kitchens, etc.).
Cultivating one’s faith within a faith community – rather than doing faith solo – is an active antidote to our “epidemic of loneliness.” “There’s a longing in our hearts…..” (so goes the song). The results are in; we have to give up some of our treasured inward-looking autonomy to gain some freedom from our epidemic of loneliness. Joining a faith community and becoming active in that faith community is good for our health.
Kim Burkhardt blogs at A Parish Catechist and The Books of the Ages.
